Distraught Thoughts

I’m not sure whether or not people truly believe seasonal depression really is a thing. I know a few people who openly confess they have a miserable time getting through the holidays without that stupid hallow lump in the chest. I hate that I know that when I feel that lump developing, what is to follow won’t be good.

I had quite the meltdown this afternoon at work and I know it was completely idiotic and brought on my a fit of jealousy, but the pain it caused, the tears that gushed from my eyes. As foolish as it seems now, it was just horrible to have experienced and it tore me down big time. It was so harsh it really spun me into such a funk,  all I can think about now is everything I can’t stand about myself, my life, and situations I have NO control over and the asshole people in my life that do.

I still can’t believe this year is almost over either, I mean where the hell did time go? Was I really THAT busy that I can specifically remember the beginning of the year and everything in between is practically a blur?? I am really hoping to change that.


One thought on “Distraught Thoughts

  1. I’m so sorry about what happened at work – it sounds like it was a total nightmare. I hope that those dark feelings are melting away by now. I had a horrible week, and I’m hoping that things get better SOON!

    I use a Sunbox each morning for seasonal depression – I’ve had the thing for 10 years and it’s still working great. It does help, but it’s not dramatic. Every bit counts though…
    take care and I hope you have a good Thanksgiving!!!!!!!

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