Coming September 2015

bb

We got confirmation on Friday that there was a peanut with a heartbeat and last night at dinner someone that I don’t even talk to came up to me and let me know they “heard you’re going to be grandparents”. My first thought was so punch her in the throat, and while I know that is not the “Christian way” to respond to things, the look on this persons face was so cheeky and sly I just didn’t know how to even take it and I was immediately offended. I always assume the worst in people and their intentions and I suppose I shouldn’t. But imagining that they were approaching me with malice toward either us or the daughter, it put me immediately on the defensive….

I mentioned to my mother during a second meltdown this weekend, that I couldn’t even imagine how SHE must have felt when people began to find out that her 17 year old daughter was pregnant. I remember how horrible I felt sitting in church being that 17 year old pregnant girl, but seeing some of the reaction from people and OUR daughter is 22, I feel really bad that I had put my mother through that.

So we’re coping.

Neither of us have a clear head and when he caught me in the baby section at Walmart on Saturday bawling while looking at the little baby clothes, he says to me ” I know exactly how you are feeling right now” and then I continued to cry for the both of us. We’re tripping out. I am tripping out that every ounce of bitterness and hurt I’ve ever felt for this child was like exorcised out of my body the moment she told us she was pregnant and HE is tripping out because he cant seem to wrap his head around my new found urgency of wanting this girl and the baby to move into our home. But in the midst of our confusion we both know and have perfect peace in the fact that if we need to do this for the sake of the baby we will. It wont make much sense to anyone who doesn’t know the whole back story, and that is okay because I have no intentions of rehashing all of that again. We know what we are feeling led to do and we are scared to death…but it has to be done… Unless God decides otherwise. And we are open to prayers for discernment and wisdom.

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “Coming September 2015

  1. I know you both will be wonderful grandparents. I hope the daughter sees how much you care and learns some big lessons from this. It is a blessing and I know you will make the most of it.

  2. I too was 16 and pregnant and delivered my beautiful baby at age 17,I honestly feel that for me this was the best thing that could have happened. At the time I was experimenting with new things and who knows where I would have been today. My daughter was 19 almost 20 when she had my buddy. I remember the day I found out I was so angry! She was on her way to cosmetology school and had been weepy for days.i said what is wrong with you, She said I’m pregnant and bolted out the door to go to school. I was left with all these emotions. Failure as a parent, I preached for years to my children to make a different way for themselves, anger at my daughter because she was raised right and was very educated on contraception .I called my sister to cry and to scream and to yell, my sister my guiding force made me see that this was ok and we were going To be ok. So fast forward I now have a beautiful granddaughter that I am completely in love with .My daughter is a good mom that works very hard to support my Ivy. Father has nothing to do with my baby other than birthday and Christmas gifts.However he doesn’t get off scott free as he is ordered to pay child support. Being a parent does make you grow up and make better choices and strive to give your child a great life! Changes are hard,when the initial shock wears off you will both be completely excited! Life is such a miracle! As my sister told me everything will be fine! I love you Shann and I am here if you need anything!

  3. You will be wonderful grandparents, and once you get to hold that baby, everything will change! It’s so great that she will have family around to help and support her! At least you have a few months to prepare, mentally and physically!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s