the age that I got pregnant for the first time….
Our family is very habitual in regard to holidays and birthdays. We have always gotten together on every single holiday including Halloween and we always do something for everyone on their birthday. It reminds me of that Seinfeld episode “The Frogger” when Elaine was getting sick and tired of having cake every time someone was sick or had a birthday at her job. It’s never a bad thing to get together with family, I love them dearly and enjoy the time. It’s just that the expectations are sometimes annoying and I knew that even though I am 41 years old, when I told my mother we weren’t going to be at her house for Easter she was going to be mad.
She text me the other night asking if she should start making confetti eggs for Easter. Mind you, the youngest kid in our family is my son who is 12 and the oldest “kid” is my cousin who is 24. So, what “kids” my mother thinks she is making confetti eggs for, I am still not sure. Last year we hid Easter eggs “for the kids” but put money and iTunes and Starbucks gift cards in them, which I’m sure is cool for them but come on man, they aren’t KIDS anymore!!! So I responded that we weren’t going to be there because we had tickets to WonderCom and then I said out loud “I just told my mother we are going to WonderCom for Easter. My phone should ring in a few seconds”. And it did.
Being the super saved Christians that we are we go to church Monday through Friday every night the week leading up to Easter. They have what is called “Passion Week” and every night there is a theme I guess you can say and we worship and prepare for the celebration to come as we remember the sacrifice that was made for us. So, because we are going for 5 nights in a row it would seem that if we missed the ONE day when it is even more crowded with holiday Christians who NEVER go to church, it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. Unless you are my mother. I know she was half joking when she said we were heathen sinners shame on you and whatever else ridiculousness she spouted out, but I guess because of past guilt and obligation I feel like dang, are we really wrong to miss THAT day of church to attend something else completely unChrist related?
So then we found out that there was going to be a Walking Dead panel that was happening the day we were going and at a time that we would have to be at church, and the fact that it’s about an hour away from where we live, we kind of stopped and looked at each other and sighed. Cant we miss church on Easter Sunday to go to WonderCom? I mean, we already bought the tickets in advance not realizing it was Easter Sunday and because we’re going to church all week, what should it matter if we miss on Sunday and what should it matter how pissed my mother is going to be because even if we went to church we wouldnt go to her house anyway and she’d be pissed anyway.
I am having trouble deciding if my “guilt” about not going to church is more in reverence to my not celebrating the resurrection of my Savior with our church family or the guilt I feel about not meeting my mothers expectations and disappointing her. Maybe it’s a little of both. And it’s stupid because Jesus died so that I wouldn’t have to feel guilt or condemnation and there is nothing I have to do to earn His love because He already gave it all on the cross. So really, Easter could be celebrated however we want to because Jesus loves us, we love Him and we appreciate what He did for us whether we appreciate it in a crowded church or at WonderCon…..